


The Cure: Friday I'm in Love

by fabricdragon



Series: The Cure [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Assassins & Hitmen, Bipolar Disorder, Bisexual Male Character, Canon-Typical Violence, Caretaking, Demisexuality, Depression, Developing Relationship, Enemies to Friends, First Meetings, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Abuse, Pre-Canon, Sharing a Bed, Suicidal Thoughts, Surprisingly Fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-16 11:29:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19317280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabricdragon/pseuds/fabricdragon
Summary: The same story as "Assignment: The Cure" from Jim Moriarty's POV plus a bit.  Jim is depressed and suicidal when an assassin  comes in and... doesn't kill him.(gifted to the folks who kindly commented on the first work.)





	1. Tuesday's gray and Wednesday too

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mickie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickie/gifts), [just_a_tad_crazy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/just_a_tad_crazy/gifts), [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts), [IantoLives](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IantoLives/gifts), [FantasyTLOU](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasyTLOU/gifts), [InnerSpectrum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InnerSpectrum/gifts), [MinMu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinMu/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Assignment: the cure](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19142290) by [fabricdragon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabricdragon/pseuds/fabricdragon). 



You would think finally removing one of the people who'd been a thorn in your side for at least two years would lead to happiness.

You'd be wrong.

Oh it did for a brief while, but then the world was that much more boring, that much duller…

Jim hadn't realized he was slipping back into depression until the assassin finally showed up. I mean, he should have: the increasing disinterest in going out, the food tasting so boring, it taking more and more energy to wash up or change clothes…

The "music to die to" playlist was actually not that much of a clue: he'd always had a morbid sense of humor.

But here he was staring at a financial project, not caring about it, and when he realized someone was standing in the doorway he couldn't bring himself to even reach for the gun in front of him.

The assassin just stood there. Jim noted the tactical gear out of his peripheral vision and noted the stance shifting out of combat readiness..."Are you just going to stand there or are you going to shoot me?"

Much to Jim's surprise he answered: "Uh…I'd planned on stabbing you or suffocating you, actually."

 _Oh, that would make sense...quiet, less attention..but so dull..._ "Oh...i...guess?"

"You guess?!" The man sounded incredulous, like he'd never planned out his death scene or anything.

Jim forced himself to turn and try to explain. "i...most of my playlist was for being gunned down? It's kind of loud for…" he considered: _some of it would work, and most of the artists had some quieter songs he could bring up_. "I guess some of it would work?"

"Uh…" the man still sounded puzzled: jim was beginning to wonder about him- also his voice sounded posh. "Are...are you okay? You haven't even tried for the gun…"

 _Did he want a shootout? I thought he'd wanted a quiet job?_ "My Gun? Oh...i was going to shoot myself, but…" _a shoot out would be dramatic at least._

Before Jim could pick up his gun the man had moved- apparently instantly - and snatched up the gun.

"...you...want to use mine?" Jim asked.  He should be able to make sense of this, he knew, but everything was like thinking through sludge.

In a much softer voice- _Oxford?  Yeah, Oxford, but then roughened up in the military_ \- the man asked _,_ “What were you working on?”

 _Working on?_ He looked back at the open computer files.“i… oh, it’s money laundering, mostly. International banking…” it still wasn't making much sense, but… probably best to not let the assassin know that.. “Why?”

“Just… kind of wondered. You were staring at it when i came in.”  curiosity about his work made sense; what he asked next did not: “have you eaten? Had a shower?”

 _Yes, the assassin in  tactical gear just asked me if I had eaten_. “Why?”

“You look like shit?”

Jim was about to ask why he cared when  he suddenly thought about his funeral...“I… guess I would look better for the funeral if i cleaned up?”

After a long pause- _no he hadn't been thinking about my funeral_ \- the assassin just said, “... yeah.”

Jim tried to stand up and almost fell over; much to his shock the SAS man- he had to be SAS- caught him and looked at him worriedly… at least the posture said worried: Jim couldn't see his face behind the night vision goggles and the mask. “When’s the last time you ate? Or …slept.”

“I cant really sleep, or i sleep but it doesn't help… and i have nightmares…”a faint flicker of alertness and alarm cleared his mind for a moment. _why the hell did i admit that?_ He looked around and suddenly realized the light had gone some time ago...“oh, it’s dark?"

The man sighed and pulled off the night vision goggles and raked a hand through his hair- _too long to be regulation, so he wasn't currently in service_ .  He stepped over and turned on the room light. He was a damn fine looking specimen, actually.  Then he looked around the room and a look like pity crossed his face. Jim followed his eyes and… _Oh God it looked awful_ … it reminded him of some of the flop houses he’d stayed in , except he’d always worked so hard to keep clean and neat then...

“Right, let's get you cleaned up.” The man said and pulled Jim to his feet. Jim had a moment of panic, but honestly… why struggle?  he didn't look like he was going to kill me though? Or… or do anything else…

“Do you have any food in the house? What a stupid question, no you don't, even the take-out is ancient.  Do you have cash? We can order in some more.”

Jim waved toward the kitchen even while he was wondering if  maybe he’d gone without food or sleep a WEE bit too long and he was hallucinating? “ in the safe… I guess?“ He waved at the drawer. “Cash in there i guess?”

The assassin put him down in a chair at the  table and pulled the drawer open. He ignored the gun and took out a wad of cash, but instead of shooting Jim now that he had the loose money, or  pocketing it he pulled out a phone and started… ordering in food?

The former SAS assassin spent the next few minutes fussing at him, muttering about his diet,  and making him drink tea with creamers in them- it was utterly surreal. Eventually he went to get the delivery and came back, and then started trying to make him eat soup...

"Are you sure you're an assassin?" Jim was really beginning to wonder about hallucinogens, which made him wonder about poison.... "Are you going to poison me? I'd really rather be shot...poisons involve a lot of pain and throwing up. "

"No I'm not poisoning you. Why do you want to die? From what i heard you were moving up in the world."

"It's not worth it. Everyone is so stupid...its boring…"

The assassin just sighed and fretted  eventually Jim asked him why he was bothering.

“God only knows.” he shook his head. “look… finish the soup and lets get you into a shower, okay?”

Jim tried to protest at that but the- _what the hell do i think of this guy as? He’s clearly not an assassin… nanny bot? Momsassin? Attack babysitter?_  While he was distracted Jim somehow ended up stripped and then the guy was walking back in- _when had he left?_ \- naked and...

Oh wow he was GORGEOUS, and… covered in really sexy scars, and solid muscle...

“Wow?” nannybot asked him, and his eyebrow quirked up adorably.

“How did you get those scars?” Jim blurted out, because it was preferable to ‘can i keep you? You’re way prettier art than that stupid oil painting.’

“IED shrapnel and bits of my transport.” he said casually  and then he picked Jim up as easily as picking up a child and…. _Big, men hurting me, men holding me down, helpless._.. “What?”

“If you lay a hand on me anywhere I don't want i will gut you.”

He protested about his intentions and then: “You're not that cute.”

 _Da Fuq I’m not!_ “I am too!” _Wait… why am i trying to convince the assassin I’m cute..._

The naked- _sexy, muscled, but way too strong_ \-  man just hauled him back to the mirror. “Look at you!  You’re covered in stale take out and you’re greasy, your hair hasn't been washed in God knows how long, and your eyes have luggage!  I don’t know what you look like any other time but right now? You are NOT that cute.”

Jim stared at the mirror and … there was a clean, muscled, really attractive combat veteran holding him up and... _I look like a homeless bum, not… not Moriarty; not even just Jim the accountant_.

Jim watched in bewilderment as the man  efficiently took them both through a shower and then put him into clean bed clothes...all while gloriously nude, which distracted him a bit.  He finally managed to ask “Why are you doing this?” after the man grumbled darkly about living conditions and changed the sheets.

“I think you remind me of people i knew… and… some of the animals i took care of… maybe, but honestly I have no idea.” he sounded as bewildered as Jim by it all.

“You… you really are an assassin?”

“I usually do sniper work, but this was an infiltrate and kill job.  I was pretty happy to get one where I didn't even have to go far out of London; most of my jobs are out of the country.”

“Have you  fed and washed up your OTHER jobs?!” _And I’m going to have to kill them if so._

“No.”

 _Oh good- mine.  Wait, wait… dangerous assassin.. What are you THINKING Moriarty?_  It felt a bit like the fog over his mind was lifting… _this… this guy was… he was nice? But he was an assassin? It didn't make sense but it was… interesting?_

Jim wasn't paying much attention to anything other than watching the man’s muscles move under his skin until he took the laptop. “Hey!”

“YOU need to sleep. Staring blankly and uselessly at a computer is not sleep.” he was standing there nude, looking firmly at Jim like… like… _like i don't know what that look is but i like it._

 _No! don't leave!_ “Where are you going?”

“I guess I'll put a few clothes back on and sleep on the sofa, but i have to call in and get the bodies removed.” The man dragged a hand through his hair again.

“Bodies?”

“I killed a couple of guards on the way in… errr… I hope you didn't like them or anything.” The assassin honestly fidgeted and looked guilty- it was adorable. “it was quick?”

“Oh… no. “ _Nope they are completely uninteresting- YOU now, you're fascinating_. “I can call a clean up in?”

The assassin- still nude-tossed him back his phone. He told him where he stashed the bodies. “And your security sucks.”

“Oh.. did I forget to turn it on when I came home last time?” Jim said idly- he knew he had, he’d been leaving it off for days.

After he arranged to get rid of the body, the man went to sleep on the couch and … _no… no ...he had to stay._..“Uh… can… can you stay here?”

“What?”

Jim flailed trying to come up with a good reason to get the man to stay and blurted out the truth. “I have nightmares, and… you took my knife.”

He rubbed at his eyes, “try that again?”

“I… I’m… look i can't sleep without a weapon, and I’ll have nightmares anyway.” Jim shrank into the bed a bit: _great, the guy already thinks I'm pathetic..._

“You want me, to stay in your bedroom, because… you…”

He winced, “I’m afraid of people breaking in when i sleep.” _And that’s because I am pathetic._

“I’m here to kill you!”

Jim  shrugged. “You're not breaking in?...and i know you’re here and… you might kill me but you won’t hurt me.” _You probably won’t kill me either, i mean… really?_

The man stared at him for a bit and muttered “... stupidest thing ever…” as he pulled on his underwear and put some weapons down on his side of the bed.

After he got into bed, and Jim repressed a rather pathetic urge to hug the man like a teddy bear, he nudged Jim gently.“So, uh… hey, target? I usually know at least a name of the person I'm in bed with.  If nothing else it's stitched on their uniform.”

“Jim: what’s yours?”

“Sebastian, I…oh hell, never mind: Hi, I’m Sebastian- nice to meet you Jim.”

“It’s… nice to meet you too…” And Jim startled because… it was.  It was nice! It was…

It was something like  feeling, instead of that heavy fog… and… it was…

Jim lay down to sleep with a brush of warm skin against his, and wasn't afraid.


	2. Thursday, never looking back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Discussions over coffee  
> Who knew the man had ethics?!

Jim slept better than he had in years, only waking up three or four times,  and each time he woke up Sebastian ran a hand down his side or made a sort of soothing noise. Jim wasn't too happy with the hand on him the first time he woke up- it was too close to his nightmare- but… it was … oddly reassuring? Sebastian didn't try anything at all, and even when he woke up with some evident interest- Jim could feel it pressed up against him- Sebastian didn't DO anything  about it…

He didn't even ask.

When he got out of bed and left the room Jim tried to think about it.  He really should be reassured that Sebastian didn't have any interest in him that way, but… it was a bit of a blow to his ego. He did have to admit that he had looked pretty awful, probably smelled awful…

_Sniff… wait, was that coffee?_

Jim followed his nose out of the bedroom and had a coffee cup pressed into his hand.  He babbled at the man about how many times he had forgotten the kettle, or left his tea sitting somewhere… mostly because Sebastian was standing in his kitchen, in full daylight, and DAMN that man was a work of art: the scars just seemed to add to it.

“you… sound better?” Sebastian said a bit hesitantly and then he smiled, and it was such an endearingly crooked grin- like trouble and bad decisions and… Jim wanted to make him smile more.

“well... food, water and sleep… I haven't been getting much of any of it.”Jim admitted.

“Didn't seem like you got much sleep, actually.”

 _What on earth did he mean by that?_  “that was the best sleep I've had in… has to be years.”

“Good God!  No one has to have you killed, Jim, you were doing a bloody great job of killing yourself by neglect!”

 _Ah… well… yes i suppose i was_. “Well, I was suicidal… yeah.”

Sebastian put a glass of water down in front of him and dumped in a packet of powder.. “Drink that.  Then you need to hydrate a LOT more, because I haven't seen you pee yet.”

Jim stared at the electrolyte powder dissolving. “You are SUCH a mother hen… are you always?” and then he couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of it all: an assassin  worrying about his hydration “ … haven't peed yet…” he muttered and snickered some more. The electrolyte stuff wasn't bad.

Jim knew, objectively, that he shouldn't ask, shouldn't  do anything to potentially unbalance this insane luck, but...“So… why aren’t i dead?”

“...Damned if i know, and eventually I have to call in and i have NO idea how to explain this one.”

It was when he said he had to call in that Jim felt like his brain finally kicked over and he realized...“You weren't hired by the gangs… so… I finally rate a government assassin? Wow… didn’t think I was on their radar yet.”

Sebastian hesitated and then admitted, “Yes, i work for the government-ish. That is, someone in government uses me to do the dirty work they can’t do above board: if it was official you’d get an actual agent, not a supposed civilian who is clearly a rogue operative.”

 _Rogue operative? So...was SAS and probably damn good at it, but something went wrong or they would have him officially_. Jim put on his best ‘I am DAMN cute’ harmless smile and said, “Well, at least you’re good looking.  If i have to get killed i can think of worse last sights.”

“I don’t think i can kill you.” Sebastian grumbled and got out the leftover take out. “I’m not used to getting cozy with my targets.”

 _Heh… mine, oh so much mine...  you just don’t know it yet_. “Ummm… so… uh… you said i wasn't that cute…” Jim looked up at him through his eyelashes.

“You look a lot better cleaned up and rested, but no way am i getting even close to you thinking ‘fuck me or i kill you’.”

He blinked at him in surprise- _that…  he wouldn’t?_ -Jim’s  smile became quite a bit more genuine, “that’s sweet.  You really are adorable.”

“I’m not adorable!” Sebastian protested and then stopped when Jim leaned over and hugged him.

“Can I call you teddy bear? You were  the reason i slept so well.” _and you don't even want me to THINK about  being forced into sex? Mine mine mine, my teddy bear, mine!_

“Teddy bear?!  Oh fuck no, i have a nickname already!  And a call name! And neither of them is teddy bear!”

 _Why ever not?_  "What are they?" _Nannybot; i bet your call name is Nannybot. You were called Mommy by your unit, weren't you: ok, maybe not to your face..._

" I'm not telling you my call name." Sebastian stared down him: Jim looked up pleadingly and he melted, "my nickname is Tiger."

"Tiger? why?"

"Long story but...i spent a lot of my childhood in India."

 _THAT’s where that odd edge to the accent came from?_ "Really? I love India!"

Sebastian looked dubious, "you mean the food?"

"No, India...at least the places I've been…"

He looked a bit incredulous, "You...went to India?"

"A bit of India, some of Pakistan, a few other countries in the region…" _Like I’m rating a government assassin and i’m not international?_

He looked unhappy for some reason., "weapons sales?"

"Not much, no...mostly money laundering; it's something everyone needs, and weapons is a tough market-too much competition."

“You can say that again,” Sebastian muttered.

“So… if you aren’t going to kill me… ah… what’s going to happen when you report in?” _Maybe don’t report in, ever…_

“I suppose I’m simply going to say I couldn't accomplish the assignment, hand back the deposit, and go get drunk…”

“Will they be mad at you, do you think?’

“Beats me, never failed before.”

“Never?!” _What in the hell are they doing throwing you in the ‘disavowable’ pile?!  Also i must rate higher on their threat scale than i thought, damn!_

Jim was still sort of preening to himself so he missed a bit of what Sebastian said, but he managed to drag his mind back to the current problem. “What if you just couldn't find me? Like I wasn't here?”

“Oh I could say that I suppose, but then they  would expect me to go kill you once they found you, and… unless I catch you doing something  I object to…”

“what do you object to?”

“Not a hell of a lot, really… I used to be loyal to the country in a sort of abstract fashion- you know, for crown and country and all that- but…”

“But?” _I don’t want to ask you to do anything that might make you bolt..._

“The number of times I’ve been screwed over by ‘crown and country’ just convinced me that I really should ask for cash up front when its the government.” Sebastian sighed moodily and set about making more coffee- probably just to have something to do with his hands, “Just as well I didn't; I'd have to return it.”

“I can pay you…”

“Nope. my loyalties are not up for sale once i take a contract.”

Jim blinked at him. “What?” _ETHICS?!  The man had professional ETHICS like that and they weren’t hiring him officially? Are they MAD?_

“I won't take your money. I’m choosing not to finish this job, even if it's the most ridiculous thing i've ever done- and that's saying something- but i cannot be bribed into breaking a deal.  I don't have a lot of ethics, but… that’s a hard no.”

 _Oh my Gawd… if i have to throw a net over this man to keep him i will… no, wait… that would probably make him unhappy, he needs to smile at me more._ “Would… could i hire you  after you’ve already told them no? I mean, like for something else?”

Sebastian hesitated. “I… guess? I mean i don't see why not?  I admit i never thought about going to work for someone i took a contract on- mostly because they’d be dead- but… after I've quit this job?  I guess.” he frowned, '' I won't take a job from you against my current employers.”

“That’s… not what I had in mind.” _well, yes it was, but it isn't now._

“What DID you have in mind?”

Jim decided to take a gamble and be honest- at least partly honest: most people any show of weakness was deadly, but he seemed to like it...“I… I meant it when I said that was the best sleep I've had in years.”

“You… want to hire me...as a comfort object?!” Sebastian voice went up into a really ridiculous register and he stared at Jim, but he didn't look angry, just… disbelieving..

Jim fidgeted and finally said, “We could call it a bodyguard job?”

“But you basically want me to make sure you eat, drink, and … sleep.”

“Well… ah… yes.” _Nannybot, totally._

Jim waited nervously as Sebastian’s expression went slowly from incredulous to a sort of resigned look and he looked around the kitchen.  Eventually he mumbled: , “I'll consider it, after I hand in my notice on this job.”

Jim damn near purred at him.

Nannybot-Tiger-Sebastian fretted at him, told him he would have to move- _obviously, a failed assassination attempt meant a second try_ \- and  gave him his contact information.  Jim could scarcely believe his luck and made all sorts of agreeing noises, gave him several of his contact methods, and promised he would be started moving by late today and  mostly out by tomorrow.

Which was  sort of true, although in fact he’d be moved in a few hours, but… better safe than sorry; what if he let something slip?

Sebastian gathered his things and left… well, he dithered at the door for several minutes instructing Jim firmly on drinking enough and getting some sun, but eventually he left.

Jim leaned happily against the door: _move out; hand the apartment off to one of the overly ambitious people that didn't know I knew he was a traitor and let him get killed; and find out EVERYTHING about my new teddy tiger._

 


	3. Always take a big bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mine! absolutely all mine, gift wrapped and delivered!  
> and in this chapter we go PAST the end of "Assignment : the cure"

It took nearly three hours before Jim was completely moved out.  He left the dead plants and the trash for the most part, and that one oil painting he didn't like anymore- it was actually quite depressing now that he looked at it again. Traitorous idiot would be moved in shortly, and working on the same internet connection Jim had been using JUST in case that was how they found him.  If they sent another assassin… well… it wouldn't be Moriarty they would find.

By four hours after Sebastian Teddy Tiger left he was rerouting most of his actual business, dropping a few clients and picking up a few new ones, and setting up monitors to try to find out who had targeted him.

By 8 hours later he had all of that underway, ordered in something to eat, and turned his attention to tracing just who ‘Sebastian: former SAS in official disfavor who had been injured badly in an IED accident while in an armored transport in the Middle East, and who was an officer of enough rank to be responsible for his unit’ was…

It wasn't that hard to find out, given how much information Sebastian had given him…

…

“Oh MY…. Oh Mymymymy my!” JIm stared at the  information and started running cross checks. “Can’t be… but he did say he was that good… and he didn't miss…. But …”

Jim sent a query in to one of his contacts asking for the real dirt- the classified file on one John Sebastian Augustus Moran- it would take a while.

“Mine…” Jim smiled at the photo of Colonel Moran.  It wasn't a great photo- definitely didn't do the man justice- but it was enough to confirm his identity.  “However did you end up getting sent to kill me? Either you’re being sent on some really trivial jobs, or i rate a bit more highly than I would think… someone seems to be a bit too smart…”

His musings were interrupted by a text from the Tiger in question… _Oh God_ , Jim barely suppressed the giggles, _he wants to know if I'm staying hydrated? Nannybot, totally._

Jim imagined Arnold Schwazenegger breaking in on a target and scolding him about his urine and DID burst out laughing.

He finally managed to send a text back: "From anyone else i would assume that was innuendo, but yes.” He added “ Almost completely moved, too.- Jim " if anyone was monitoring Sebastian’s communication it wouldn't do to let them know he’d been moved for hours and that the guy in his old apartment wasn't the right guy, after all.

“Please be careful: they will replace me.-S”

Jim glanced at one of the cameras carefully placed to look into his old place from outside and saw his traitorous would-be usurper still at work on the computer.  “I will. I’d feel a lot safer if i had a teddy bear, or a tiger.- J”

“I’ll think about it.-S”

JIm smiled and put the take out food away- it was cold anyway-, shut down the computer and  tried to sleep…miserable sleep of course- nightmares- but nearly at dawn he checked in on his  old apartment and found that his pet traitor was lying in an awkward sprawl in the living room… not moving… a _nd there seems to be a kitchen fire? Ts_ k! so the assassin started a kitchen fire to explain… _oh it's probably supposed to be smoke inhalation, or carbon monoxide poisoning, but the fellow was far too sloppy…_ Jim smirked and hit the signal to the gas in the apartment...that should be sufficiently loud to cause quite a mess, AND make it hard to identify any bodies…

Jim got out the takeaway remains and watched the fire response until he fell asleep again.

 

Jim spent the day working, and preparing to move even further- _might be wise to move his base of operations out of England for a bit and let the government think they got rid of me; i can operate anywhere with an internet connection after all._

Jim operated as he usually did, catching short naps until he woke up convinced his father was coming, or someone had found his safe house, and then going back to work… but he did make a point to eat, and drink, even if he couldn't really sleep well.

He was startled when his phone rang- not a text, a call, and from Sebastian’s number?

“Jim? Sorry to wake you…”

“You didn’t. What are you doing up at this hour?” Jim asked when he realized what time it was.

“What are _you_ doing up?” Sebastian’s voice softened a bit.

“Woke up a few hours ago, nightmares: having cocoa.” Jim considered an abrupt voice call- _trouble_., “You didn't call to offer to be my teddy bear, did you…”

“Well, that may be how this works out… you had people who could get rid of a body, and you have international contacts…”

“yesss?” _What on earth? Who did my teddy tiger kill that he needs ME to get rid of it?_

“My boss decided to terminate my employment possibilities… permanently.”

 _I will skin them alive; that's MINE!_ “Are you okay?!”

“Started out just coming off the adrenaline and now i’m moving into angry as fuck.” Sebastian’s voice was that level tone of someone who was REALLY angry, not just yelling, “he tried to get me with an injector in my sleep- you're not the only one who sleeps with a knife.”

 _Gift wrap the man for me why don't you- maybe I’ll be kind and kill them first and then skin them._ “Pack anything you really need or care about, and give me the address.”

Sebastian gave him the address and Jim set to work: it didn't take long to pull up the information on his building… _perfect… oh, wait, he might think that was a problem… some people like their neighbors..._ “Do you… errr… care about any of your neighbors?”

“Only the little old lady in the flat below me, but… I think she’s at her granddaughter's this week? Why?”

“Would you mind awfully if the building blew up? I’m looking at the maps and there were quite a few unexploded bombs in that neighborhood- wouldn't be a surprise if they missed one…”

Sebastian was very quiet for a moment and Jim was worried that maybe this was one of those things he had ethics about, but then he said, “Not a problem on my end, no… might be nice if the neighbors got out, but I honestly don't know most of them.”

“I’ll try to arrange for the damage to be centered on your flat, and your downstairs neighbor who isn't home… OOh! And looks like one of the other flats on that side is rented by some folks who work night shift so they aren't home…” Jim started viewing ‘minimal casualties’ as a challenge. "We can keep the blast in unoccupied flats-well, plus yours- but they'll  have to be slow sorting through the rubble…"

“You can arrange that fast enough?” Sebastian sounded impressed.

“I’m a consultant,” Jim said smugly, “I solve problems for people… for a fee.”

“So you're  solving my problems?”

“I’ll have a new identity ready to go pretty soon, and your escort out- and help getting any other belongings out- will be at your door in fifteen minutes.  The bomb blast should go off within an hour after you leave.” _And then you’ll be all mine… and… and hell, where am i going to put him? He’d need to stay with me, wouldn't he?_

“So...what’s the fee?”

Jim pictured big warm Tiger Teddy in bed fending off nightmares and  delivering dinner and making sure he didn't get too wrapped up in things...“I think you know already.”

“I’m REALLY not a teddy bear, Jim; I'm rude, and insubordinate, and I’m not used to living with anyone…” 

Jim sighed, “And I’m a hell of a  lot less cuddly normally- to be frank i’m a bastard with a temper and control issues when i’m not coming up from a bad bout of depression- and… I’m not exactly used to living with anyone either.” _and this is either going to be brilliant or a disaster._

“...Make sure you eat, stay hydrated, and get some sleep, huh?”

“Weeeell… it would be a shame to have one of her Majesty’s best snipers and not actually DO anything with him… I think i can keep you busy.”

“How do you know I’m that good a sniper?  Oh, and my fees for that tend to be-”

Jim didn't feel like negotiating so he upped his planned on offer by twenty percent and threw out the hook.. 

“Pardon?!” Sebastian sounded strangled.

Jim added “With bonuses possible for extraordinary work, but given what i’m getting you out of? I think it's more than fair.” 

“Can you even afford that?!”

“I wouldn't offer if I couldn't, and yes: it's a big chunk of my budget but i intend to get my money’s worth out of you… Colonel.”  
“You found out who I am?!” Sebastian sounded stunned and impressed enough to make Jim’s egotistical heart practically stutter with joy.

He purred into the phone, “I am very good at what I do, Tiger, and you gave me an incentive… to do anything really: Oh, and your ride is there.”

Jim had him driven out of the city and switch cars twice before finally bringing him to his current home near the University.  He watched the man get out of the car and shoulder a heavy bag with ease, and then the look on his face as he recognized the area.... The driver knew better than to ask any questions or stick around, so once he was all unloaded the driver took off and Jim came out.

“Apparently you went to school here.”

“For a while, yeah.”

Jim picked up one of his lighter bags and helped him get everything inside. “I don't carry bags for people, normally, but i wanted you out of sight before the early morning classes.  Right now you look a bit out of place.”

“My hair’s not that short,” Sebastian smiled faintly, “I could always grow a beard- probably fit right in jogging most mornings.”

Jim’s brain short circuited a bit at the aesthetics of Sebastian jogging. “Uh… well, uh… yes that would…” he looked Sebastian over, “actually that would stand out, not blend in.”

“So… this looks better...” he looked around as though he expected the place to… to look like his old flat.

“This is a stage set, so no, I never let it go like that.” Jim admitted quietly. “I just brought over the few things I really liked from the flat.”

“Stage set?” Sebastian put the last bag down in the living room and looked around, “Looks like… sort of like a professor lives here.”

“Close.  When I'm here I’m Jim Dougherty, accountant- does taxes and business accounting for people in and around the University, and tutors in math and physics if he likes you or you pay enough.” Jim smirked, “Less publicly I can get you the test questions in advance for a somewhat higher fee, since I make up a lot of the tests for the professors.”

Sebastian’s eyes widened, “If the rates on that are anything like what my idiot roommate paid for his English essays back when… why are you bothering with anything else?”

“Amazingly some of what i get paid in is insider trading information from the families, and of course news about who might be in the market for things, or need some exceptional favors… it's a cover identity, but a profitable one, and thus directly connected to some of what i was likely targeted for.” Jim shrugged. “So… ah...i didn't get all the details about your boss trying to kill you, care to fill me in?”

Nannybot Tiger insisted on them both having something to eat and drink, so they ended up sitting down over a quick breakfast.  

Sebastian gave a fairly crisp military account of calling in his refusal to proceed with the assassination, his contacts statements about his future work being in question, and then waking up with an assailant in the room and how that went- Jim tried not to let it get to him- “... and then I called you.”

“Well, my agent on site got the injector so that's something- we should have the results soon.”

Sebastian blinked a bit, “results?”

“Whether it was aiming at killing you or-”

“What ELSE could it be?”

“Well, since they are clearly idiots for not recognizing your  value, Tiger, i assume they might be stupid enough to think almost anything: they could have been trying to kill you on site, or they might have wanted you brought in for interrogation.”

“..oh.. I uh… didn't think of that.” Sebastian sipped at his coffee. “I mean I'm pissed at that too- i would have come in if he’d asked.”

“I do hope you understand that I'm NOT thrilled with the idea of you being asked anything about me you didn't already give them.”

Sebastian took a deep breath, “So...what now?”

“You work for me. We already discussed the fact that, well, I'm not the best person in the world at taking care of myself, even if I'm brilliant at solving other people’s problems.”

“I did notice.”

“So.. most of your job is-”

“Make sure you eat, sleep, and stay hydrated, and maybe open a window and look outside every once in a while.”

Jim sat back in his chair, “yeah, basically… and kill anyone who tries to kill me, and maybe a few hits on some people because even your accessible records are incredible.”

“So… if this is like… “ Sebastian dragged his hand through his hair and Jim was starting to want to do the same for some reason. “You want me to share your bed?”

“I don’t believe I'm saying this, but yes.”

“Is sex involved in this? Because…”

“I… doubt it? Maybe? Um… I mean it could be but not…” Jim found himself once again completely tongue tied.

Sebastian just dragged a hand across his eyes and  sighed, “OK, first things first: I need a room to myself, both to have a space of my own and someplace to store my stuff, EVEN if I’m sleeping in your bed sometimes.”

Jim was showing him where  his room was when he added, “…and then I think we need to have a long talk about your depression and  suicidal tendencies, both of our nightmares, and the fact that you really ARE that cute once you’ve cleaned up.”

**Author's Note:**

> I've been a bit overwhelmed with that pesky real life stuff (it does take one away from the fan fiction writing) but wanted to write something to keep up the 'writing' part... so ... instead of all the WIPs i should be doing? have a POV change story!


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